{"id":658,"date":"2023-11-01T22:07:29","date_gmt":"2023-11-01T21:07:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/?p=658"},"modified":"2023-11-01T22:07:31","modified_gmt":"2023-11-01T21:07:31","slug":"top-10-eft-myths","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/blog\/2023\/11\/01\/top-10-eft-myths\/","title":{"rendered":"Top 10 EFT Myths"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Top 10 EFT Myths<\/h1><\/div>\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\r\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\r\n\t\t<\/div><\/div><\/div>\r\n\t\t
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*If you\u2019re struggling in EFT, don\u2019t go it alone<\/strong>\u2763\ufe0f\u2763\ufe0f\u2763\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1.<\/strong> \u201cEFT fixes everything.\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0WRONG. EFT is magical, but it\u2019s not magic. If you feel stuck with a couple or individual, don\u2019t automatically blame yourself or the model. Sometimes it\u2019s timing, sometimes there\u2019s something you don\u2019t know that\u2019s blocking progress and sometimes there just isn\u2019t enough safety or basic stability to go through a process like EFT.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2.<\/strong> \u201cYou should be able to get couples through all the steps and stages in 8-20 sessions.\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0NOPE. That study was based on a specific sample size that might not be representative of who shows up in your office in 2023. If you talk to EFT trainers, many will say they wish those numbers weren\u2019t out there. If you are working with a couple that has trauma (both from childhood and in the current relationship), it\u2019ll take a lot longer to help them reach their therapeutic goals. If you have session-number shame, join the club. We\u2019ve all been there. I had to stop looking at the session number and just attune to my clients.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. \u201cEFT therapists are warm, fuzzy and all about emotion.\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0Maybe some are – but the best EFT therapists I know are either assertive or have learned to be assertive in session. EFT therapists are very active in session. It takes warmth AND a bit of ummph to interrupt the cycle!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4.<\/strong> \u201cIf you\u2019re an EFT therapist, we\u2019ll be friends!\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0Sorry to tell you. Wrong again. Just because someone loves EFT doesn\u2019t mean you\u2019re automatically going to align on values or beliefs, or that your personalities will click together like a magnet. The beauty of EFT is its ultimate human message – we are hard-wired to connect, and we need to feel like we matter. But, EVERYONE wants that. Does that mean we need to be besties with everyone who promotes that message?\u00a0Nope.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

5.<\/strong> \u201cIf I put in the hours, I\u2019ll get Certified.\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0Sigh. It\u2019s not hours. Just like with your clients, there are emotional blocks you\u2019ll likely have to work through to really get there. Approach Certification with an open hand. The more you try to control it, the more likely you\u2019ll get in your own way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

6. \u201cOnce I\u2019m Certified – I\u2019ve arrived and I\u2019m done growing in EFT.\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0Yikes. How do I tell you this? Certification is more like the\u00a0beginning<\/em>\u00a0of learning. Are you ready to throw in the towel? Please don\u2019t. There are so many who feel just like you. Carol Ann Conrad, EdD, LMHC and Certified EFT Therapist wrote her dissertation on the Evolution of the EFT Therapist. (The summary article is on the\u00a0resource page – for registered users – translator’s note)\u00a0<\/em>Check it out! It\u2019s very validating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

7.<\/strong> \u201cEFT is a model I can read about and integrate into my work.\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0Have you tried this? Reading about EFT isn\u2019t enough if you want to actually do EFT. This model is a foundational model. It\u2019s a way of seeing the world. In order to lay the concrete, you need specialized training and support. If you don\u2019t want to go all in – that\u2019s ok! You don\u2019t have to. Just be careful of \u201cdabbling\u201d and expecting results.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

8. \u201cA little EFT isn\u2019t enough.\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0Ok, maybe this is counter to number 7. But, hear me out. A little EFT really is better than no EFT. People who have gotten specific training and are really trying to help their clients through an attachment lens, slowing down the experiential process – that alone will make a huge difference. It\u2019s ok if you don\u2019t have the Tango perfectly. It\u2019s ok if you struggle with reactivity. Your presence and non-pathological view comes through. I cringe looking back at my earlier EFT work. But, I also remember my clients feeling like I really made a difference.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

9. \u201cThere\u2019s no room for cognition in EFT.\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0That\u2019s not true! Remember that meaning-making and sharing the cognitive load is actually a huge part of assembling emotion! Yes, we follow emotion – but keep in mind that emotion\u00a0includes<\/em>\u00a0cognition. Cognition isn\u2019t necessarily content. The difference? Content is distracting and often not in the attachment channel. Cognition (how we make meaning of what\u2019s happening) is really important.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

10. \u201cIf I\u2019m not as good as (enter your EFT hero\u2019s name here), I won\u2019t be able to really help my clients.\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0I\u2019ve seen so many EFT therapists say they wish they could refer their clients to their EFT hero. No! You matter. Your relationship with your clients matters. It\u2019s actually better for you to stay with your client and work through the stuck spot with them than for them to get a higher level of expertise from someone they don\u2019t have a relationship with.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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October 27th 2023<\/mark><\/p>\n\n\n\n

text: Kelly Bourque picture: gopusss<\/mark><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kelly Bourque is certified by ICEEFT EFT Therapist and Supervisor, she is offering a subscription to SUPERPOWER ALLIANCE<\/a>, breaking down interventions in bite-sized learning chunks. You\u2019ve probably seen her videos about it. She would love to have you join her!<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div>\r\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\r\n\t\t<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Top 10 EFT Myths *If you\u2019re struggling in EFT, don\u2019t go it alone\u2763\ufe0f\u2763\ufe0f\u2763\ufe0f 1. \u201cEFT fixes everything.\u201d\u00a0WRONG. EFT is magical, but it\u2019s not magic. If you feel stuck with a couple or individual, don\u2019t automatically blame yourself or the model. Sometimes it\u2019s timing, sometimes there\u2019s something you don\u2019t know that\u2019s blocking progress and sometimes there […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":659,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-658","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-bez-kategorii"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/658","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=658"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/658\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":661,"href":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/658\/revisions\/661"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/659"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=658"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=658"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mentalia.pl\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=658"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}